 Sherry B Jordan “Wize Woman of the Month” showcases extraordinary women among us. Today, we feature Sherry Jordan , Executive Business Coach and Change Management Consultant.
Sherry’s career path reflects steady dedication and momentum, despite personal and professional adversity. Her ability to help others find what’s important and get back on track attracts a steady stream of executives to Sherry’s private and group programs. She is the owner of Northwest Coaching Group and the author of the popular blog, Entrepreneur Executive.
Here’s a look at what makes Sherry Jordan tick:
What makes you feel most alive? Nothing is as exciting to me as being presented with a new challenge and having to “find my way” through it. I love the learning process, the sense of power as I realize my ability to master a new skill or concept, and the excitement of knowing new discoveries await me through each stage of life. Real life examples for me include striving to achieve early admission to college in my teens; moving to a new city and learning to be on my own in my twenties; reaching corporate executive status while at the same time battling cancer in my thirties; and going back to college to discover a new career path in my forties. Now in my fifth decade of life, the grand adventure continues. I am grateful to be here and eager to discover what lies ahead…
My mom always told me… the only thing you can control is your attitude. Deceased for 26 years, her indomitable spirit lives on for me in this phrase which has been a common mantra in my life. I can’t think of a better gift a parent can give a child, than the notion that one can survive anything… with the right attitude. Whether mustering the strength to declare “I can do it” or the courage to surrender and allow the circumstances to unfold, my mother’s voice echoes in my mind and heart. I still miss her every day.
This always takes priority in my life: My relationships. I run a successful business, work long hours and manage a heavy client load, yet my primary relationships with my husband, family and friends take utmost priority in my life. I believe we only have one chance to do this right, and at the end of the day we will all be remembered more for the quality of our relationships than for what we accomplished professionally. I am presently supporting my 86 year old father following a series of health setbacks over the past several months. The circumstances have required me to take many weeks away from my business and, despite the physical and emotional toll of thousands of miles of travel; I consider it an honor and privilege to share this life experience with him.
Who or what inspires you? I am inspired by people who overcome adversity against overwhelming odds; by those who are driven by faith in that which they cannot see; by those who continue to see the best in others and the world, despite personal heartbreak and disappointment; by those who dig deep to discover their own beauty and potential, even when no one else seems to; and, by those who value the simple things in life more than the acquisition of money and power. I am inspired by the hope of newborn babies, by the human potential for compassion, and by the awareness that beauty and inspiration can be found almost anywhere… when we have the eyes (and the attitude) to see.
What’s the one thing you’ve accepted about yourself with age? I’ve accepted that I don’t need to be an expert at everything. I’ve learned to delegate tasks for which I don’t have the time, interest or skill sets… to the people who do. I’ve learned that when I can focus on my strengths, the weaknesses suddenly become less important.
Who are you a mom to? I tend to be a mother to almost anyone who wants or needs one! In all seriousness, I perceive it as a great honor to take on the role of nurturer. I enjoy this kind of relationship with my two sons and my nephew, as well as many young fellow cancer survivors. The ability to provide support for friends, family and clients gives me enormous joy.
What advice would you give to other Wize Women? Don’t be concerned about what others think of you, but be very concerned about what you think of yourself. Spend time every day, working to improve your relationship with YOU.
Thanks to Sherry for sharing herself with us.
Until next time,
Delila
 Yesterday was the first day back for most of the children where I live. Starting school is a very big deal… especially for the youngest students and their parents.
Young children live in the present moment, and future time is a vague and confusing concept for them. Therefore, as we prepare our children for preschool, our parental attempts to build excitement can actually have the opposite effect… and can create added anxiety. Following are a few tried and true preparations which may help to ease the transition for your child, and also for you.
• Allow your child lots of opportunities to practice putting on and taking off their own shoes, and fastening and unfastening (or pulling up and down) clothing when using the bathroom. These important steps of independence build confidence and self-esteem, and also make life away from home much easier.
• Select and read aloud from children’s books about preschool or kindergarten and about making new friends. These stories provide indirect preparations for the new school experience to come, and reading them aloud may encourage your child’s spontaneous questions and curiosity. It’s nice to do this many times before the first day of school arrives. Check out Sam and Gram and the First Day of School by Dianne Blomberg.
• Begin adjusting your child’s sleep schedule several weeks before the first day of school, to avoid the additional stress exhaustion can add to the first day jitters. If they are not waking easily or happily, then continue to moving bedtime back until they wake on their own. Allow plenty of time in the morning for waking, dressing, and eating breakfast, so your child does not feel rushed or anxious. Once you’ve established a comfortable routine, stick to it.
• Share true stories about school with your children. They’ll love to hear the true stories about your own childhood, and these real life stories can provide a lot of information and comfort as they make their own transition to school.
• Engage in pleasant, positive car conversations as you pass the school. These might include some positive comments about the playground, teachers, or the new friends they’ll meet when school starts.
• Keep your parental anxiety in check. Go ahead and process your feelings of sadness or anxiousness or loss with your partner and friends, but don’t allow your child to hear or see your reservations about this next step of independence. The best way to ease your child’s transition anxiety is to convey confidence about the school, the classroom, and the exciting new journey your child’s is embarking upon.
What do you find most helpful for your own children when it comes to managing change and transition? I hope you’ll join the conversation and share your own insights and experiences with all of us!
Until next time,
Delila
Bang bang. You wish you were invisible, that you could disappear from view to avoid the scrutiny of parents looking on as your child pokes, pinches or points an imaginary finger pistol at his playmates.
I’ve recently heard from two mamas who are struggling with the shame and frustration they feel as their little ones explore and express their power in physical and verbal ways. When children explore their physical power through gun play or the like, parents often feel powerless and embarrassed. I hope my sharing my own experience will provide some insight. Here is a re-posting of a blog I wrote on this very subject:
January 15, 2010
 On the day I handed down my beloved baby doll Tina to my toddler son, she died twice…first in a hit-and-run with his dump truck and later by drowning. Recalling the time my younger brother had scalped that very same doll, her demise at the hands of my tiny son elicited a lecture so shaming I’ve (thankfully) erased it from memory.
My precious little one was all boy, though he had never seen television or movies or violent images in books. Elliott was raised in a carefully prepared environment rich with sensory activities to engage his curiosity. His shelves were filled with puzzles and blocks and art supplies, not guns and swords and pirate ships. We avoided gender stereotypes, rarely even dressing him in blue.
So where did this fascination with violence come from?
I don’t recall the first time I uttered the enlightened and oh-so-above-it-all mantra, “We have a peaceful home. We don’t even pretend to play with weapons here. Everybody has the right to be safe.” But I do remember my son retreating from me time and time again to avoid hearing those words, while attempting to hide a carrot-stick sword or paint brush pistol from my view.
Even with years of education and training, I felt hopeless and ill-equipped to parent my own child.
Some experts suggest that by forbidding imaginary gun play and other such activities, parents increase children’s interest by driving it underground and thus create a situation where children feel they cannot safely express their feelings and impulses. While others advise parents to prohibit toy weapons altogether, I was unable to find any study linking pretend gun play with an increased incidence of violent behavior in adulthood.
Michael Thompson, Ph.D. (author of Raising Cain) has this to say: “What we know is that boys in all cultures around the world wrestle more, mock fight more, and are drawn to themes of power and domination, but that’s not the same as hurting someone, so it’s not necessarily a cause for worry.”
At some point I had an epiphany. What if Elliott’s intrigue with weapons indicated a natural impulse to gain control of his circumstances, and nothing more? And what if my own feelings of guilt and shame about his interest in these things could be far more damaging than any run-in with a rubber sword?
I was merely passing on my values, but what if my lecturing and nagging had damaged his self-esteem?
My son’s interest in guns was not a passing fancy; he is naturally drawn to mechanics and strategy, and to power. What has changed is my response. When I realized the toll it was taking on our relationship, I vowed to stop shaming Elliott. And to talk less and listen more. By stepping down from my soapbox, I now know my son better and can respect his varied interests – which include piano and literature, crocheting and cats.
Last summer Elliott invited me target shooting. Even though it was only Airsoft, I said “no thanks,” in a tone that spoke volumes. He quickly countered, “Mom, guns are just tools. You don’t have to be afraid of them. Shooting at targets isn’t hurting anyone. It’s fun.” I allowed him to be my teacher that day. He demonstrated proper handling and gun safety with total acuity and, no doubt anticipating another eco-lecture from me, vehemently assured me that the pellets would biodegrade “within a reasonable time frame.”
Holding a gun felt awkward until my first “hit,” which was accompanied by an unexpected surge of adrenalin. I glanced at Elliott who, grinning more broadly than ever, proudly exclaimed, “Mom, don’t you think it feels kind of good when you hit the target?” I had to be honest. Hitting the target did feel good.
What transpired on the way home was a delicious helping of parental bliss. He uttered the words “Thank you for taking an interest in this, Mom. I know it was a stretch for you.”… and meant it. In that precious moment, ‘all boy’ didn’t seem ‘all bad.’
Until next time,
~Delila
 “Wize Woman of the Month” was created to honor and showcase the extraordinary women among us. This month features Annie Gulosh, a local Portland Mortgage professional and creator of the popular blog, 365ThingsPortland.com.
Born and raised in the Pacific Northwest, Annie’s passion for her community is the driving force behind her desire to be a leader in her industry and an enthusiastic advocate for her favorite city… Portland. She has attracted over 20,000 followers to her blog, where she provides reviews and recommendations for everything from local restaurants to live theatre to sporting events… sprinkled with fun facts about Portland history and culture.
Widely loved and respected for the compassion and commitment she brings to every business transaction, volunteer project, and key relationship in her life, Annie is a Wize Woman with an uplifting message to share…
What makes you feel most alive? I am most alive when I’m trying something new, and when I’m in the company of friends and family. I love adventure and am usually up for just about anything! The thrill of whipping down a mountain side with a snowboard strapped to my feet is among the things that make me feel most alive.
My mom always told me… to smile. She always said, “you’ll get so much further in life with a smile and a positive attitude.” Thanks to my mother, I think I’ve become successful by being a friendly and helpful person and I’ve learned to enjoy life thoroughly and with lots of laughter, even during the hardest of times.
This always takes priority in my life: My biggest priority in life is taking care of myself. I believe we all need downtime and time to nurture ourselves and I make sure to make time for the little things like a pampering pedicure, time at the gym, and alone time to read and reflect on my life. I know that only when I am a complete person can truly serve those who are important to me.
Who or what inspires you? Love inspires me. I believe that love is the greatest gift we have as humans. A day spent with a loved one, or helping someone in need is something that keeps me inspired to move forward.
What’s the one thing you’ve accepted about yourself with age? That there will always be someone with more knowledge, and that listening is the key to learning. It’s amazing what you can learn through careful listening.
Who are you a mom to? Haha! Is this a trick question? While I don’t have any children of my own, I am naturally inclined toward a nurturing role with my friends, my family, my clients; and to people I encounter elsewhere in life. My mother inspired me to be compassionate and I think nurturing is a part of that.
What advice would you give to other Wize Women? Sometimes the simplest things in life make the biggest difference. Smile, listen, and give love whenever you can. I’ve been amazed at how the difficult things become easier, and life becomes more enjoyable, when I come from a place of love.
Thank to Annie for sharing herself with us.
Until next time,
Delila
Choosing the photographer to capture family memories isn’t easy. We all take photos of our children, and maybe occasionally even get one that feels worthy of entrance in the county faire. But what if you had access to the expert eye of a photographic artist… someone who knows just how to capture the magic of the moment and the unique spirit of your child?
My friend Paul Sivley is a seasoned professional photographer with expertise in portraiture, interior and exterior architectural and business imagery, products, food, and travel imagery. From the moment I stepped into Paul’s studio in Wilsonville, Oregon, I was captivated by his images and the stories they embody.
Most of the magic, he explained to me, does not actually happen in the studio. Paul travels to many locations to meet the needs of his clients, choosing the ideal indoor or outdoor setting to suit individual design preferences.
 Paul has spent the past 25 years traveling the world and capturing photographic images that inspire and motivate. His gift for capturing the essence of a story – whether it is a product, business, or personal story – is unparalleled. Here’s what he has to say about what inspires his photographic approach:
“Memories are fleeting without preserving them in a permanent fashion. I love that I get the chance to get to know people and make and capture those memories for all time.”
If you’re looking for the perfect person to capture the joyful memories of childhood – from infancy right up to Senior Graduation photos – Paul can help. Click to view Paul’s professional portfolio. Also take a moment to visit Paul Sivley Photography on Facebook!
Contact Paul Sivley at his Studio:
Sivley Photography, Wilsonville Oregon
503-502-3385 or email: psfoto@comcast.net
To read what others have to say about Paul’s work please view his profiles on Linkedin, Angie’s List, Yelp and City Search.
Until next time, here’s to the stories that matter and the people who tell them.
~Delila
 “Wize Woman of the Month” was created to honor and showcase the extraordinary women among us. This month features Sara Wiseman, a popular author, psychic, musician, and mom.
In her books, music, workshops, and intuitive consulting practice, Sara is known for waking people up and giving them fresh eyes with which to see themselves and the world. Personally, she’s been instrumental in helping me gain deeper trust in my intuition and confidence in my choices. To learn more about Sara and her work or to schedule a session with her visit SaraWiseman.com. Hear a sampling of her music at MartyrsofSound.com, and check out her latest books, Writing the Divine and Your Psychic Child on Amazon or in bookstores.
And now, a few words from Sara…
This always takes priority in my life: My thoughts. I would like to say my family or my work, or something else, but the truth is I am very, very happy in my mind, thinking about theories and figuring out how things fit together. I enjoy “following the breadcrumbs” as I try to figure something out. I am very happy working in the areas of brain activity, exploring new ways of gathering information through meditation, intuition, spirituality, creative expression, music, writing, art, etc. I am fascinated by the way consciousness works.
My mom always told me… that I had a good “imagination,” and hearing this over and over made me believe it! As a child, my parents put me through a lot of odd experimental testing when my dad was a professor at Stanford; I was just a kid, and found myself studying ink blot cards! So, this experience had a part in shaping my life. I’ve never felt particularly intellectual, but put me in a situation where there is right-brain thinking, creativity and imagination, and I can do most anything! This is probably why, in my previous career, I was so comfortable working with other creatives in the world of advertising and marketing.
Who inspires you? I am inspired by people who follow their path, no matter what. I admire people who break from the mainstream and just do their thing, even though it may seem scary, difficult or “weird.” We only get one lifetime in this particular lifetime! I am inspired by people who figure out early what they want to do, and do it. And, I am even more inspired by those who are stuck in the “mainstream” for many years and then suddenly discover their true self… and GO FOR IT.
What’s the one thing you’ve accepted about yourself with age? The gravity of the body may be balanced by the levity of the mind. I look now at women in their 30s with babies on their hips, and think… oh yeah, I remember that body. But as you move through the decades, things change. I certainly don’t have the same body as I did when I was 14! And I have a different body than I will when I am 84. The body changes… but also the mind changes. There is more emotional depth, more heart opening, more compassion and more love as we age. It’s like the heart and mind get stronger, with every passing year. Our ability to love expands, the older we get.
Who are you a mom to? I’m a mom to four people; I would say kids, except one is 28 and one is 20! At home, I live with a teenager and a pre-teen. All of my kids are very verbal, creative, and strong—at the holidays, it is hard to get a word in edgewise! It is fun to realize that somehow I brought these very strong personalities into the world!
What advice would you give to other Wize Women? Motherhood is a life-long profession, but we will only be actively employed (as moms) for a few decades. My advice is to enjoy your kids as people, not as progeny. Allow them their differences. Hold them lightly, and love them tightly. But always understand they are individuals, Divine beings in earth bodies, with their own life path and purpose—as original and unique as you and yours.
Thanks to Sara for sharing herself with us.
Until next time,
~Delila
“Patience is also a form of action” ~ Auguste Rodin
It’s tricky being a woman. We tend to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders and believe we’re responsible for everything around us.
Our children make bad decisions and we question our parenting skills.
A business deal falls through and we wonder how we could have saved it.
A partner is acting strange and we assume it’s somehow our fault.
As women and mothers, we have the power to influence the emotional wellness of those around us, especially our loved ones. Yet, we often take on this responsibility at our own expense.
I took an unexpected and unwelcome hiatus from this blog due to a series of events and circumstances which have shaken my emotional foundation and left me temporarily at a loss for words. Over the last several months two beloved family members have passed away and, as if that isn’t enough to manage, I’ve been named in an ugly, costly and time-consuming lawsuit. As a result, any sense of “normalcy” seems to be lost for the moment.
Despite the physical, emotional and financial trauma surrounding my present circumstances, there are still bills to pay, deadlines to meet, meals to prepare, and a never-ending pile of laundry calling my name. And there is a hard truth to face: It’s time to truly accept that life sometimes brings circumstances beyond my control.
I realize it’s time to stop trying to control my circumstances, and return to the care of the ONE THING over which I have some control… myself.
To me, caring for myself means the occasional, unapologetic soak in the tub with a gin and tonic and a trashy gossip magazine. It means sleeping in ‘til noon from time to time, adding a line item for massage to my monthly budget, and giving myself permission to walk away from the computer in favor of back-to-back episodes of Glee with my son. As a mother, business owner, and the sole bread-winner in my family, these are guilty pleasures I rarely allow myself and I’m realizing… maybe it’s time I should!
What guilty pleasure can you allow yourself today? Choose a good one and please, share it in the comment section below for other Wize Mamas to see.
Life can come at us pretty fast and, as women, we feel it deeply when things aren’t going as planned. Here’s to liberating ourselves from the need to be the mothers of humanity. And here’s to nurturing ourselves with what we need to be and feel our best.
It’s good to be back.
Much love until next time,
Delila
 Jane and her Mom, Elnora When I select the women I want to feature in this Wize Woman of the Month column, I think about people who are inspirations in my life. Jane Crawford is a woman who literally leaves me awestruck with her ability to juggle the responsibilities of parenting, running a business, and finding time to nurture herself and her relationships.
Jane is a single Mama who raised a special needs daughter, Breck Suzanne, whom she describes as the absolute joy and best teacher in her life. Jane is also a gifted massage therapist and body worker, a rock and gem expert, and a successful business woman. She owns Lavender Stone Massage in Beaverton, Oregon, where she offers structural and energetic healing through the use of stones and essential oils. Those fortunate enough to find themselves on Jane’s massage table may receive a profound insight or two, straight from “the Book of Jane.” She graciously shared a few words with us here… but you may need to get on Jane’s table yourself to hear the rest of the story.
What makes you feel most alive? Stepping onto the deck of a cruise ship; standing on the beach and watching the waves; and knowing my touch has helped someone feel better.
My mom always told me… “Sit up straight!”… which is why I am doing that right now!
This always takes priority in my life: My beautiful daughter, Breck Suzanne Crawford. And she always will…
Who or what inspires you? Those wonderful people in my life who drop everything to come when I call. I’m talking about the friends who would come and get me at 2am… or help me move (that’s the big one, isn’t it?).
What’s one thing you’ve accepted about yourself with age? That my 20 year-old body is gone forever, and this 50 year-old body is working just fine.
Who are you a mom to? “The Queen,” Breck Suzanne.
What advice would you give to other Wize Women? Have a good cry in the bathtub when you need to, and learn to say, “that was a mistake.” Then move on…
I speak from personal experience when I tell you that Jane truly does work magic with her hands and those hot stones! For the holidays, how about treating yourself to a Lavender Stone Massage?
Until next time,
Delila
 While the central premise of marketing revolves around the idea that buying things will make us “happy”, a study of materialistic values among children determined that kids who have the most in a material sense tend to be the least generous, the least content, and the less confident (From Natural Life Magazine, March/April 2008). This revelation comes as no surprise to any parent who has witnessed the tearful tantrums of a child caught up in the vicious cycle of begging for “things” – candy, toys or the immediate object of their desire – only to discover that the joy at having acquired the thing is fleeting and empty.
Yet, this is what we face as consumers… holiday hype and commercial marketing often seems to overshadow the real meaning of the season.
What if commercial holidays were no more worthy of celebration than the loss of a tooth; the changing of the seasons; the sprouting of a seed; the birth of a child; or the historical milestones of any culture? And what if we honored each of these milestones with equal reverence and without regard for commercial hype?
I offer these few simple suggestions for slowing down and staying connected to the things that really matter this holiday season:
Walk outdoors and collect objects from nature – pinecones, autumns last leaves, rocks and twigs can make a festive winter table decoration.
Keep a Gratitude Journal: Every member of the family can share one thing for which they are thankful. This becomes a lovely keepsake treasure of shared moments.
Volunteer: There is perhaps no better way to remain mindful of the real meaning of “giving” than to serve those less fortunate.
Feed the birds: Large pinecones smeared with nut butter and rolled in birdseed make a tasty treat for birds…hang them in a place where you can observe what happens
I wish you a holiday season filled with Joy, Peace, Gratitude & Love.
Until next time,
Delila
 MamaWize is about connecting women by sharing wisdom and building community. This monthly Wize Woman of the Month column spotlights strong women juggling many responsibilities and making a positive difference in the world. I recently had the extraordinary experience of a healing session with Rebecca Singer, this month’s Wize Woman. My time with Rebecca was nothing sort of transformational, and I am honored to share her voice and wisdom with you now.
Rebecca Singer is a Shamanic Healer and Spiritual Teacher who lives in Portland, when she’s not in Mongolia. With roots deep in ancestral healing traditions, she works with people to help them be who they came to be and want to be. For 25 years, she has dedicated herself to connecting with the earth and sky and bringing those spirits forward to heal and guide others. She lives with her partner, Will and her two Costa Rican dogs, Salsa and Osa. Learn more about Rebecca and her work at www.shamanicenergy.com or email her at becca.sing@gmail.com
What makes you feel most alive? I love being surrounded by the wildness of nature… whether on a horse running across the Mongolian grassland, or standing at the top of Mt Chirripo in Costa Rica. And I have to say, there’s nothing quite like being on a camel….so exquisite! I also feel totally alive as I stand in pure light as a healer, drumming and calling out to the Spirits in song on another’s behalf.
My mom always told me… to be afraid. She didn’t say it in so many words, but certainly did with her actions. Fortunately, because my spirit was BIG and adventurous, I didn’t let this message slow me down! I learned that I really didn’t need to be afraid, but I really did need safety and protection. Oh, and mom often also told me to “tone it down.” Sorry mom, it just wasn’t meant to be! I love you.
This always takes priority in my life: To me, it’s all about being true to my heart, and following my passion. I have stepped off many a metaphorical cliff, with no landing in sight, yet somehow always landed on my feet. My path has led to many different countries and cultures, through many relationships and single-motherhood, and from actress to teacher to non-profit volunteer. I have learned to go where I am called to continue my healing work. The next phase of my life includes a commitment to assisting the Mongolian Reindeer people… and so it goes.
Who or what inspires you? My partner, Will, inspires me with his capacity for kindness, as does my son, Liam, with his music. I am likewise inspired by the Dalai Llama; Rigoberto Menchu; (my first teacher) Patricia Spradling; (my three legged dog) Salsa,… because of her loving eyes and eternal happiness; Siberian Tigers; Butterflies; Charlie Chaplin; the performers of Circue du Soleil; Jane Goodall; and the Reindeer people of Mongolia. Oh, and all of nature; fierce and gentle conviction, and big laughter.
What’s one thing you’ve accepted about yourself with age? As part of a broader acceptance that at age 61 I won’t be able to do absolutely everything I would love to do in this lifetime, I realize I can’t uproot myself continually anymore. I need a rhythm in my life, which for me means spending some of the year here in Portland and some abroad. Another bit of acceptance: my outside appearance sometimes appears older than I feel on the inside… but other days they are congruent…and that’s ok!
Who are you a mom to? Biologically and in my heart of hearts I am mom to my amazing son, Liam Singer, a gifted musician (check out his latest CD, “Dislocatia” ) I have also been a mom to various animals; students in schools, prisons and juvenile justice systems; and people in the process of dying. I believe I bring a mother’s loving, healing energy to every client… and share it from the bottom of my heart. I once climbed 2 kilometers down a rainforest mountain – over tretcherous terrain the Red Cross was afraid to navigate – to help a wounded man (I didn’t know) after a car accident in Costa Rica. Is that being a mom?
What advice would you give other Wize Women? It’s our time. Speak out. Step up. Wake up. The world is depending on our wisdom to come forth in writing, speaking, song, healing, laughter, art, action. Be loud. Be bold. Be gentle, Be compassionate. Treat others with respect, and demand to be treated respectfully. Come on. Get healed. Get whole. Your healthy feminine energy is being called to transform the planet. IT’S OUR TIME!
Visit www.shamanicenergy.com to learn more about Rebecca and her work.
If you know of a Wize Woman you would like to see featured on MamaWize, be sure to contact me!
Until next time,
Delila
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